Socialising for the first time in months is a bit strange. For one thing, the world around me seems to have changed while I’ve stayed still; or perhaps things have stayed the same but everyone’s older; maybe the world is crazy or I’m crazy.

Australia is mental. There is something completely and utterly psychotic about the country I live in. Sydney is infinitely better but it’s still Australia. I’m a citizen but I deliberately do not identify as Australian because of the heinous things that happen here and attitudes that exist (I have other countries to identify with).

I’ve become completely out of touch with what is popular on the radio not because I don’t listen to it (I hear it pretty much everywhere I go), but because it is genuinely soulless and terrible and it’s indistinguishable from song to song. As someone who’s studied some music, there is almost zero variation. And the stuff that does stand out is obnoxious.

I don’t own a TV because as far as I can see, TV is a social activity and I live on my own (bliss!). Why I would own a TV is beyond me. Similarly, why I would have any idea what Jimmy Choo Shoes are (I thought it was some sort of Cockney slang until I discovered it is a new brand of hideous and overpriced shoes) is beyond me. Nor why it seems so amazing and heinous that I would not own a TV or know what these pieces of crap are.

If you do not know what the Arc de Triomphe is, or even that it is in France, have no idea of basic common knowledge or ability to critique current events as presented by the news then you honestly have no place to make fun of me for not knowing a brand of shoes because it was in a Beyoncé song.

It’s amazing, I read books but no-one else seems to?

Then there’s the enculturated wedding and baby industry. I don’t mean marriage and children, I mean weddings and babies. Because we’re all in it for the photo ops, the never-ending posts on Facebook, buying every little piece of crap associated with the above and then boasting about how much you spent on it all.

Oh and then there’s going travelling and boasting about how you went to London to have High Tea (but didn’t go to any museums or galleries or castles or anything actually interesting). You could waste your money anywhere. Does it have to be in London? Oh wait, spending money is the best thing evar!

Don’t get me started on this bizarre divide between pent-up miserable conservative couples on one side then the seedy polyamory & BDSM ‘lifestyles’. Everyone seems to be one or the other. There is no just being with each other and having some fun and a bit of experimentation and enjoying your contented love. No, either you are going to be completely frustrated or totally insane.

Dating and hanging out with friends would be fun if it included people who weren’t completely mad.

I feel kind of cold and alone.